Finding a mentor might take a lot of time and effort. You don’t connect with just anyone, and you want to find the ideal individual to assist you in achieving your objectives and moving up the corporate ladder. However, as you mature and acquire perspective, you may realize that the counsel you get no longer resonates with you.
It may be time for things to change if you find yourself disagreeing with or even resenting your mentor’s influence. Listen to this week’s wealthy & Regular podcast episode about outgrowing our financial idols, then read on for some things to keep in mind when you transition away from an adviser relationship.
Don’t be Afraid to Have Difficult Discussions.
Even considering quitting a relationship can feel disloyal and traumatic for some people. After all, this individual took time out of their busy schedule to assist you in resolving your issues. However, not all endings have to be tragic or chaotic.
Keep in mind that mentoring is only meant to be brief. While it’s excellent if you can form a lasting bond with this individual, mentors understand that you’ll be going forward in your profession and that you’ll need them less and less as time goes on. They may have even noticed your progress ahead of you and are only waiting for you to reach the same conclusion.
When it’s time to say goodbye, keep the following suggestions in mind to ensure that your mentorship ends on a positive note and that you continue a warm and pleasant relationship.
Assess the Circumstance.
It’s likely that you and your mentor both need a break to recharge and rethink if you’ve had a disagreement or are starting to dislike their advice. Taking some time to think about the relationship will help both of you assess if it is still helpful.
If you’ve decided to discontinue the mentorship, keep in mind that the goal is to do so on the best possible terms.
You may believe they did something wrong or failed to assist you, yet finishing on a nice note may benefit you in the future with possible connections or prospects.
Staying Isn’t Something You Should Do Out of Obligation.
Ending a relationship with someone who has been useful or who we have grown to care about can feel like a betrayal. A good mentor would expect you to advance in your profession and will encourage you to try new things and take measured risks. Their job is to assist you in moving forward; if this isn’t occurring, it’s time to move on.
Consider the advantages and disadvantages calmly and make a decision based on facts rather than emotions.
Hopefully, you’ve had a chance to talk to your mentor about what you’re going through, and you’ve come to the conclusion that it’s time for the relationship to stop.
If your mentor appears unconcerned about the issues, request a meeting with them, either over the phone or in person, and explain how they’ve helped you grow and how you’re ready to pursue other chances. This could be awkward, but perhaps you’ve built enough trust in each other to make the dialogue civil.
Use Simple, Straightforward Language.
Make sure you use direct and courteous words in your final meeting. While it can be difficult to express ourselves, continuing a connection that is no longer benefitting you is actually a disservice to your mentor.
If the choice to discontinue the meeting is not mutual, keep your language as straightforward and professional as possible. Avoid blaming your mentor for not doing enough for you by keeping the dialogue focused on how your needs have changed.
Make sure you pay attention to what they have to say and allow your mentor to offer their thoughts. While listening to them may not persuade you to change your mind, it may provide insight into concerns you may face in the future or prospective problems to be aware of.
Thank You For Your Consideration.
Remember to thank your mentor for his or her time and assistance. You want to make sure you exit the connection on a positive note since you never know when your paths will cross again.
Thank your mentor for their assistance, and give specific examples of how their advice assisted you in overcoming a hurdle or gaining new insight. Spend some time talking about your future plans and any challenges that your mentor may see coming down the road if it feels right.
Ending a mentoring relationship can feel like a harsh halt, but it should be viewed as more of a pause in reality.
While your paths may never cross again due to life circumstances, you should always keep the door open for future opportunities. Remember that while a mentor/mentee relationship isn’t meant to last a lifetime, making a friend out of it can be invaluable.