“Burning your life down” may seem like an extreme measure to obtain the fulfilment you want, but bold steps yield big outcomes.
Lindsay Teague Moreno’s mother died unexpectedly at the age of 53, and she concluded that the only way she could turn her grief into progress was to “tear everything down.
” She was aware that her mother had left behind a slew of unfulfilled ambitions, and she didn’t want that to happen to her.
Lindsay went from being a stay-at-home mom—a fair decision, but not one that worked for her—to a speaker, serial entrepreneur, host of The Boss Up Podcast, and author of three books in just two years.
Wake Up: The Powerful Guide to Changing Your Mind About What it Means to Really Live, her most recent book, will be released on October 26, 2021.
Lindsay admits that opening up hasn’t been easy, but she has no regrets. She declares, “I’m not going to let my triggers keep me tiny.
Chief Storytelling Officer Kindra Hall talks to Lindsay in this episode of SUCCESS Stories about finding your purpose, pushing through the discomfort, and why balance doesn’t exist—and why that’s OK when you’re changing your life.
Related: Is Success About Fulfilled Life
Consider Having Your Own Burial.
To get the motivation you need to improve your life, remember that you only have one life to live, and the time to accomplish whatever you want with it is right now.
Consider how you’d feel if you were lying in your grave, staring up at your mourners at your burial. What do they have to say about you?
- Are they pleased with themselves?
- Are they describing you in the manner in which you hoped to be remembered?
- Are they dissatisfied?
- Do you recognise the individual they’re referring to?
Pay attention to your emotions in the aftermath of your (false) death:
- Are there things you’ve always wanted to do but have been afraid to try?
- Have you ever had a dream that you never got around to realising?
These are what Lindsay refers to as “somedays”: the things you always say you’ll do “someday,” but haven’t prioritised.
It was rafting down the Grand Canyon for her mother, for example.
Yes, this activity is a touch morbid. But it’s better to do it now, while you still have the ability to do so, than putting it off and never turning those somedays become today.
There Is No Such Thing as Balance.
Lindsay has found “the six cornerstones of a good life,” as she describes them. She claims that achieving success in these areas leads to overall fulfilment. They are as follows:
- Personal aspirations
- Finances and work
- Connecting to the Divine
If you’re wondering how you’ll manage to work on all six at the same time, the answer is that you won’t. Phew!
Lindsay understands that she’s pitching a lot, which is why you won’t address all of the pillars at once. Instead, you’ll pick one, work on it until you’ve accomplished everything you want to in that area, and then move on to the next.
Lindsay is also frank about the fact that focusing just on one area at a time will make your life feel unbalanced when you first begin this process. Accept it and keep your eyes on the big picture.
Lindsay, for example, focused on growing her business and earning enough money to provide a decent lifestyle for her family for two years.
It was difficult for them, but she felt she was acting in their best interests. She moved on to strengthening those familial bonds once she’d acquired financial stability. When your daily life feels unstable, realise that in the long run, it will lead to security.
How to Discover Your Life’s Purpose
Finding your true calling is a deeply personal experience. The first step is to figure out what you genuinely value in life.
Lindsay, for example, identifies hedonism as a basic value. That may appear shallow, but it’s truly about loving “the experience of life,” as she puts it.
Another is universalism, which she defines as “wanting everyone to come together as one.”
When you’ve determined your personal core value, use her four-step Whoop Experience to delve deeper into how you’ll put it into action in your life.
- What you desire
- The result of making that aspiration a reality
- Obstacles that may arise
- How do you intend to make your wish a reality?
- If you could go back in time and ask your adolescent self what their mission was, they would most likely give you a different response than you do now. That’s quite normal: Your mission will change over time.
You can repeat the process for your next purpose once you’ve achieved fulfilment with one.
Push Yourself to Push Through the Discomfort.
It’s impossible to cook an omelette without cracking a few eggs, and it’s impossible to transform your life without ruffling a few feathers.
Aside from the chicken metaphors, revamping your life can be unsettling for both you and the people you care about.
Many people, for example, despise discussing money, especially admitting that they wish they had more of it. Lindsay, on the other hand, will gladly tell you that it has improved her life. “It’s great to be wealthy!”
she exclaims. She, on the other hand, battled for a long time to communicate openly about her finances.
This dissatisfaction isn’t limited to your mental struggle. People, especially in their social groups, dislike change. They’ll fight back and try to persuade you not to disturb the status quo.
Lindsay suggests adopting the “when you… I feel… because…” method during uncomfortable interactions. For example, “I feel wounded and rejected when you criticise my actions in front of our family,” because “I want to feel like you support my efforts to improve my life.”
Because you won’t be able to reach everyone, you may need to choose to spend less time with specific people.
Lindsay, for example, is no longer in contact with her father.
She still finds it difficult to bring up such contentious topics, but she recognises that discomfort is a necessary part of progress. Chickens are trapped on the ground, but if you work hard enough, you can achieve anything.